Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Notes to Myself - Not a Game, but a Lesson Plan

With 3 players in this juggling game, I've got 3 lessons to learn fromeach of them. The test is not falling for anyof them indiviually. Spred my attention out between teh 3 of them, mange my time, learn from them and teach them in turn.

The Guard Dog teaches Trust.

The Wolfhound teaches Patience.

The Lone Wolf teaches .... I don't know yet. Confidence, maybe. Mine, not his.

The Locals:

The Wolfhound isn't always available, or responsive to text messages. That's because he's still owned by another mistress, whom he cannot fully escape. When he's managed to sneak away for a while, he will contact me. Wait for the next snow storm to really get an idea.

The Guard Dog... the Rottweiler. The dog who looks and sounds dangerous, and is in the wrong situations, but who was trained to protect. Intimidating and victim to "Judging a Book by its Cover" syndrome.

So many things about Guard Dog remind me of my ex, but then I have to remember that GD is very different. He comes from hardy stock, good breeding, and even though he's fucked up in his past, he's made an active effort to bring himself to better things and stay there. He's also well trained.

but so was he or so he claimed and you saw and felt for yourslef how much he hated things about you and women in general he dlighted in your torture there wqas soemthing wrong with him he was dangersous.

 There's a big difference between a cat and a dog. cats are loyal to themselves, chaotic neutral in many cases. Dogs are generally lawful good or chaotic good.

Both the Wolfhound and the Guard Dog have their issues with mothers in their lives, but they also have strong bonds with fathers, sister,s and other relatives. No one's perfect and we all have black sheep int eh family, but most are grey.

The Wolfhound has been sniffing around me for a while, I'm comfortable with him after years of flirting and long talks. It's always been clear that with the Wolfhound, things are a more... bestial nature. A shape I"m comfortable with and a background close to my own. He is also very easy going and casual, and there has never been any pressure. If anything, there's been a lack of pressure until given the go-ahead.  It could be just nerves, but those will fade in time.

The Guard Dog is fairly new, but has made the most profound progress. B/c he reminds me of what I've left behind, every time I learn new truths about him, they cross out my previous assumptions. While there is passion and desire, there is also temperance and control. The Guard Dog was a rough pup int eh past, but with proper training, grew into the self-assured, protective, well-conditioned guardian he is today. He is gentle to me, but doesn't hide his rough side in tales of past exploits. He is honest and doesn't push established boundaries without consent.

 The Outsider:

The Lone Wolf.

He is damaged and the best way I can help him is by being available to talk and listen to his problems. He is in need most of my emotional stability and compassion. Neither the Wolfhound, nor the Guard Dog are in need of "fixing" as far as emotional issues go. They each seem to have control over their own shit, and even tho their lives aren't exactly how they would prefer them to be, they are comfortable in basic needs.

The Lone Wolf is a man-child, struggling to find his place as Alpha Wolf. He must carve out his niche in the world, but lacks the self confidence to do so. He has been the omega of the pack for most of his life and doesn't have the means to break free and begin anew.

The Wolf is anything from Lawful Good, to lawful Evil, depending on who you ask. This wolf... is to depressed to really show his true form. I have hope for him though.

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